The Schlow Burger

With cheddar, bacon, romaine slaw, jalapenos, BBQ sauce and crispy onions


Makes 2 "fat boy" burgers


  • 18 ounces ground beef (Ask the butcher for 80 percent lean. Do not change this part, please!)

  • 1 ounce (2 tablespoons) extra-virgin olive oil

  • Salt and pepper

  • 4 tablespoons mayonnaise

  • 2 teaspoons prepared white horseradish

  • Juice of half a lemon

  • 2 thick slices good quality Vermont or English cheddar cheese

  • 2 hamburger buns, split in half (buy the best ones you can get; I like brioche buns)

  • Crispy Onions

  • Fresh ground pepper



  • Combine the ground beef with the olive oil, salt, and plenty of black pepper.

  • Divide the meat into two 9-ounce patties and refrigerate until the grill is ready. (Don’t do this more than an hour in advance.)

  • Combine mayonnaise, horseradish, and lemon juice in a mixing bowl and season with black pepper. (You can do this ahead of time and store it in the fridge.)

  • Heat the grill to high.

  • Take the hamburgers out of the refrigerator 5 to 7 minutes before you are ready to grill them.

  • Place the burgers on the preheated grill and cook 1½ minutes (for rare).

  • Give the burgers a quarter-turn to “mark” them, and cook 1½ more minutes.

  • Flip the burgers over and cook 1½ minutes.

  • Rotate a quarter-turn to “mark” and cook 1½ more minutes.

  • Transfer the burgers to the grill’s top shelf or to a cooler section of the grill and cover each one with a slice of cheese.

  • Turn the grill off and shut the lid.

  • After 4 minutes, open the lid. The cheese will be melted and the burgers cooked rare to medium-rare. Toast the buns, if desired, and place a burger on each.

  • Spread plenty of the horseradish sauce on each burger; it should drip down the sides.

  • Top with Crispy Onions and season with freshly ground black pepper.

  • Slather more sauce on the other half of the bun and place it on top of the burger.

  • Grab a cold beer or iced tea and get ready to make a mess. This is not a dainty meal!